something fishy

Monday night, after our Senso-ji excursion, we went down to the Tsukiji fish market area (basically where sushi lovers die and go to heaven, the area probably has the best, freshest sushi in the whole world) to try and find this highly recommended restaurant, Edo-Gin. But believe it or not, buildings in Toyko do not have street numbers as such - an address (say, the one for this restaurant) will read something like 4-5-1 (which is how this one did). So we went in search of this 4-5-1 (supposedly there is some method to this apparent madness - the first digit represents a neighborhood, the next a sector within that, and the final number a couple of blocks within the sector - sounds easy, right?), and ended up asking some cops for directions, then got lost, asked a random dude smoking on the corner for directions, he looked scared and bowed apologetically, asked some random young salaryman-type for directions, he couldn't figure out where the damn place was even after doing some crazy shit on his cellphone... We walked around in circles for a while, finally gave up, and just threw ourselves at the mercy of the best looking sushi place in sight.

Once inside, after discovering the establishment we'd chosen didn't have an English menu (which this mythical Edo-Gin place supposedly did), we ordered one Omakase-style multi-course sampler dinner to share from our young kimono-clad waitress. It was a fateful decision...

First course, a tiny piece of tofu (we think) with a slice of turnip and various creamy shit on top.

Second course (presented with a sprig of ivy), a sweet shrimp, a whole little fish on top of some seaweed-wrapped roe, three edamame pods, and best of all, a little glass cup full of a lotus root in some wet, slimy seaweed that very nearly set off my gag reflex as I tried to get it down.


Third course, sashimi. This ranged from the orgasmically amazing (the medium fatty tuna pieces) to the what-the-fuck-am-I-eating-and-will-I-survive? (the white pieces of unnamed fish, which Maya and I agree, seemed to expand as we chewed it and suck the walls of our mouths right in, till we had wash it all down with water for fear of spontaneous implosion.)


Fourth course, a mystery teapot that turned out to contain a delicate broth with mushrooms and shrimp, beautifully topped off with a squeeze of lime juice (see the slice sitting up there?). To partake, you had to remove the slice of lime, take the upended cup from the top of the pot, pour the broth into that and sip it while dipping in for the shrooms and crustaceans. Yummy yum yum. No, seriously.

Fifth course, grilled fish of some sort sitting on a bed of salt (Maya: "mmmmmm, salt.") with lotus root, tiny sweet potato chunks, a pickled something or other (delicious, whatever it was), and what looked the stump of like a bonzai tree. And some pine needles on top (presumably not for eating). This (pine needles excluded) was scrumptious.

Sixth course, tempura lotus root (see a theme here?), mushroom, pepper, and some kind of fish. Also, very good.

Seventh course, sushi. Besides the sweet shrimp (which did that weird mouth-sucking implosion thing) and the sea urchin roe (see the handroll topped with orange gunk, second from the right? Slimy and disgusting - imagine, uh, sea urchin roe), it was, to quote Maya, "fucking amazing." When you go to a sushi place in the States and order "fatty tuna" or "toro," you're not even getting close to the real thing (not even in name, since in Japan it's called "o-toro."

Eighth course, miso soup. Sounds familiar, but it was still different than in the U.S., namely way more flavorful and with lots more stuff (veggies) floating around in it.

Ninth course, desert: some kind of green tea-flavored cake with what we guess were slices of asian pear and what definitely was a ginormous grape - the latter, as Maya pointed out in amazement, tasted naturally like artificial grape flavor(?)


As insane as the food was, maybe even more insane was 1) the bathroom in this place, which featured one of those legendary hi-tech Japanese toilets complete with control panel that could make the seat and cover go up and down by internal motor and set off a bidet, butt drier, seat heater, and who knows what else; then 2) there was the farewell that we received from the restaurant staff. As we headed for the stairs (to go up just one small flight to the exit), our waitress directed us to the elevator, which she had called, and once we got in, she started bowing so deeply that if the average American tried to follow suit, they'd likely end up at the chiropractor. "Arigato gozaimas," ("Thank you") she said over and over again. Unfortunately, the elevator door wasn't closing, and I was getting very uncomfortable watching her bow and thank us repeatedly, so I frantically hit the "close door" button, and we made our escape - or so we thought. But then after paying our bill upstairs, we headed for the exit, and the entire staff of the establishment suddenly turned, loudly yelled something unintelligible at us (probably "stupid gaijin, nobody actually eats sea urchin roe!" No, I kid - it was almost certainly some combination of "Thank you," "Goodnight," and more "Thank you"s), and bowed over and over. We practically ran out the door - and promptly got lost all over again.